On a Quiet Room and a Bouncing Voice
So I’m presently in a spot where the whole “blogging thing” isn’t going very well. At least not by the standards I should be adhering to. Wait, that’s not completely true. They’re not going very well by my standards, either. And I don’t say that in order to gain sympathy (while, hopefully, avoiding pity). It’s simply where I’m at right now. Part of that is due to things needing a tweak (or several); part of it is due to my not keeping up with other blogs and bloggers as I once did, either. Still another part is probably just “one of those things” which cannot be quantified or clearly named.
The temptation is to give up, to give into discouragement. I’ve done it before, telling myself I’m not in God’s will or the time for XYZ is over and it’s time to move on. There have also been times when any one of those situations has been the case.
Yet I don’t think any can be applied to this particular occurrence. Because the thought came to me yesterday that back when I started (and re-started) blogging, the purpose was to help me write – to find my own voice, to develop and grow and learn. And as I grow, as things are developed and fine-tuned, there are going to be times when it’s messy and awkward and oh-so-silent and even lonely. I’ll say and/or do the wrong thing. My voice, my words will be left to bounce off the walls of an empty room, to slide off of crumpled pages.
As such, I can’t quit now. I can’t leave this room in disarray. To stop would be to imprison myself in some way in this still, lonely place. And that would be worse than this temporary silence.