On Hidden Things
There are writers I envy at times, for the way they capture moments, evoke a mood or a feeling, for the way they share their lives so honestly and beautifully, and for what they hold back and what they coax forward. That envy I allow to be sparked usually leads to discouragement on some level. I know because those are the times when I let my words fall silently down, dust returning to dust.
My office job has been crazy as of late. I try to keep the details to a minimum online because I don’t want what are, ultimately, temporary frustrations to have unnecessary long-term consequences. Sometimes the thought pops up to share a bit more, to divulge a few details here and there. But I don’t. Because some things are best kept private, save for a trusted few.
There was a blog post – is still, I think – on my computer. I plumbed deep, weighed words, and considered thoughts. I don’t think it will ever see the light of day. It should see the virtual trash bin (perhaps after it’s transcribed to a safer place) if it hasn’t done so already. I’m realizing there are some things, some moments that shouldn’t be displayed here in any sort of a bid to increase traffic.
Sometimes I hate the way I catalogue moments under “Blog Post Ideas”. Life is more than a status update or essay or Instagram feed. Sometimes I allow that knowledge to fade. It makes me sad.
Jesus was walking down a dusty road, having endured betrayal, desertions, and a tortuous death all before a glorious resurrection. Up ahead He sees two people He knows. Only one is revealed in the biblical narrative – Cleopas – and of him and his companion the following is told in Luke 24:16:
But their eyes were restrained, so that they did not know Him. (NKJ)
But their eyes were kept from recognizing him. (ESV)
. . . and their eyes were holden so as not to know him … (YLT)
And I wonder why Jesus would hide who He was from two of His disciples, but then I wonder if maybe it’s because He knew they wouldn’t really hear what He was about to say otherwise. I’ve had it where someone tells me something over and over, but it doesn’t “click” for me until someone else says it. Maybe Jesus knew this encounter had to play out the way it did so these two men would, at last, hear what He had probably already tried explaining to them six different ways until Sunday.
Sometimes some things need to stay hidden in order for something else to come out into the light.
So I continue to watch, listen, record what needs to be held onto, let blow away that which is not in need of posterity.
I hope I live this life well, that I tuck away the right things and share what needs community, what is needed in community.
Because life is more than this blog, but there is no blog without this life.
**Photo Credit: Nina Matthews ©2014 (Flickr via Creative Commons)